The only thing we have to fear is a giant wheelchair-crushing squid.
Well… uh… actually, I guess that’s the only thing I have to fear.
Curious creatures, these luminous swimmers be. Forward and backward, gliding effortlessly with the smoothest of directional shifts, they keep a giant eye focused on the floating human while maintaining a short but cautious distance. Which is stranger? Ten tentacles and undulating fins or a single air-filled glass eye and strap on rubber fins. I suspect each contestant would vote for the other in such a contest.
Before we cast our vote, let’s consider a few weird facts: On the one hand, the Caribbean reef squid has an enormous eye-to-body size ratio, the grandest of any land or sea creature. They also have chromatophores and iridophores that glow and change colors. They can leap out of the water like a flying fish and die after reproducing. On the other hand, depending on gender, snorkelers are known to shave their faces or armpits. They snore, fart, get bored, dream, sleep, kiss, worry, skydive, and snorkel. Perhaps, you can see where this is going? By my count, it’s squid nine and snorkeler twelve on the weirdness scale.
